By Cam
So I got this crazy idea last week (as if that NEVER happens to me, right?) to make a more conscious effort of getting physically fit. You see, I’ve been feeling rather sluggish lately. And while it could be the weather or the late night writing sprints that are pushing my energy levels to the max, I realized it probably had more to do with diet and activity.
Truth is, for about 120 hours a week, I live a very sedentary lifestyle (this estimate includes time spent at my day job, writing at home, and sleeping). And while I wish I could be more active during my writing time, I’ve learned it’s pretty hard to type on the computer while running, biking, swimming, lifting weights, or really doing anything that involves more than wiggling my fingers at the keyboard. It’s also very easy to fall prey to late-night Sour Patch Watermelons, chocolate, and coffee.
So to combat this downward spiral, I started a new workout program on Saturday: P90X. It’s a monster of a program which will require me to commit to not only the workout regimen, but also the nutrition plan. I’m doing the Lean version so my first workout was with the Core Synergistics DVD. Let me tell you, I about DIED with a move called SUPERMAN BANANA:
Don’t let this silly name fool you!
The SUPERMAN BANANA is in no way a superhero nor a potassium-rich treat. No, no, my friends. This move took down my name and slapped me senseless, all while reminding me to stay hydrated. I was beyond sore the next day. But no rest for the wicked! On Sunday I did the Cardio workout and, again, SUPERMAN BANANA laughed in my face, along with his friend WACKY JUMPING JACK.
Anyway, I can honestly say that today, my body HATES me.
BUT.
I already feel more alert (although it could be the Motrin), and my muscles (although screaming like a little girl) are thanking me for using them again.
Now, I’m not promoting P90X or getting money from them or anything like that (and as a disclaimer, if you’re ever going to take up a fitness program, you might want to check in with your doctor first), but this program got me thinking more about writing and how SIMILAR it is to any kind of extreme fitness regimen (for obvious reasons, I’m using P90X as an example):
P90X is a 90-day program. You’ll see results if you commit to the fitness AND the nutrition side of the program.
Writing is a commitment. This isn’t a secret. But you can’t just slap some words on the page and call it day. You have to commit to both the writing AND the revisions if you want to see a cohesive story form.
P90X relies on something called “Muscle Confusion,” where essentially it’s mixing up the workouts every day to the point where your muscles don’t have a chance to plateau.
Writing uses a different kind of “Muscle Confusion,” where essentially your brain needs to be open to the unplanned actions of your characters so they don’t seem static or one-dimensional.
P90X offers 12 different kinds of workouts ranging from Yoga to Shoulders/Chest to Cardio to Abs to Kenpo (kickboxing-like moves). It concentrates on all the major muscle groups as well as elements you wouldn’t necessarily consider in a sweat-producing regimen for a package that’s fun, full of surprises, and complete.
Writing has loads of steps — outlining, drafting, revising, revising, revising, querying, etc. You have to concentrate on the macro elements to your story (story arch, character development, plot threads, etc.) as well as the “smaller” details (active words, tight sentences, grammar, formatting, etc.) for a package that’s fun, full of surprises, and complete.
If you cheat in P90X, you’re not going to get the results you set out to accomplish.
If you cheat in writing (sloppy writing, sending out queries before you’ve finished the MSS, not revising enough, not writing at all!), you’re not going to get the results you set out to accomplish.
P90X produces a lot of sweat and tears. It’s important to eat right, stay hydrated, and BREATHE or your body will cry mutiny.
Writing produces a lot of sweat and tears. It’s important to eat right, stay hydrated, and BREATHE or your body will say ” Screw you, fancy Writer Pants!”
Bottom line is this: You don’t get by easy. If you don’t put in the hard work with your story, characters, research, craft, etc., how do you expect to see results? The simple answer is: You don’t.
I’ll keep y’all posted with my P90X progress. I’m really hoping that in addition to toning my body, I’ll be toning my mind and increasing my stamina and overall energy level. And my writer’s goal is to write a book (at least the first draft and one round of revisions) within this 90-day time line. Hopefully I’ll make it to then…? WISH ME LUCK!
By Cam
Last week I traveled here:
to do this:
(stirring apple butter, in case you didn’t know)
and eat a lot of this:
which meant I ended up doing very little of this:
but that’s okay because next month is this:
Where I hope to write this:
And come December, I’ll be ready to do this:
Can’t. Wait.
Anyone else planning on cashing out their writing mojo for NaNo next month?
By Cam
First order of business — I promise I’ll be posting a recap of RWA Orlando. I’ve written half of it but admit I sort of just want to post pictures of all the fabulousness. But I realize posting pics isn’t really all that informative, so you might have to wait a few more days because…
I have NEWS! And it needs my undivided attention! I won’t go into specifics except to say that if there was ever an incentive to finish the spit-polish on my MS, it’s this.
Which brings me to my Two Week Goal. I’m giving myself two weeks — 14 days/336 hours/20,160 minutes — to REVISE and QUERY. Why two weeks? Well, I’m almost there. All I need is a little push, a reasonable deadline (that I can be accountable for), to get me closer to the next step. But there’s always a bit of a risk when you’re about to send out that first batch of queries. What if *gasp* you think it’s ready but it’s really not? For me, that means my MS runs the risk of fatal Too-Soon-itis. And we all know how that goes.
So let me take you on a little journey to illustrate how querying too soon is like taking a trip to the ER:
- You make the obvious decision to go to the hospital because you have a broken arm/volatile stomach/third eye/no eye/other grotesque injury.
- You see a sign on the hospital door that says STOP! FALLING BRICKS ABOVE!
- You shrug because it’s a HOSPITAL and you’re SICK and no bricks are falling on your head. Stupid sign.
- You check in with the gum-smacking receptionist and take a seat in the germ-infested waiting area.
- You realize how bad waiting is going to suck because all you want to do is get through Triage and see a dang doctor for your broken arm/volatile stomach/third eye/no eye/other grotesque injury. But you’re stuck waiting it out in an area that’s too small, too packed, and too smelly for comfort.
- To pass the time until someone calls out your name, you decide to: read a magazine/suck at Sudoku/moan/cry for your Momma/play Hangman without the paper or pencil/plant your ass at the reception desk and tap your finger on the counter until someone pays attention to you. (I don’t suggest this last option because chances are good the guard standing by the sliding glass door is bored out of his mind and is itching–ITCHING–to throw a sucker to the curb.)
- FINALLY your name is called (and with minimal butchering of your last name) after just ten hours of waiting!
- You drag your tired and cranky and now-smelly body to Registration where you give every pertinent detail of your life and promise your first-born child/cat/dog/cupcake to a woman who eyes the small-hand on the clock like she’s getting paid to do that instead of processing your info.
- Twenty-one hours later and a nurse with a glowing halo above her head and a parade of silky white doves following her every step, calls you back.
- You say a silent prayer and hope it’s really you she’s talking to.
- You gleefully tell the ER Doctor (who’s none too pleased at having drawn the short straw) all about your broken arm/volatile stomach/third eye/no eye/other grotesque injury. No detail is too small to leave out. This is your LIFE we’re talking about here.
- ER Doctor jabs you in parts you didn’t think you could get jabbed.
- After thirty seconds, she tells you your ailment was all in your head and if you just take this discharge sheet and follow the security guard outside, he’ll make sure you get to your car alright (and put you on the Never Allowed Back To The Hospital Again list).
- You drive home, stare at the wall for a few days/weeks/months, then Eureeka! You realize maybe that ER Doctor was onto something. Maybe you just had a case of the Too-Soons and a good scour or ten in the shower was all you needed to bypass the ER waiting room in the first place.
Obviously, I’ve taken some liberties with this analogy. I mean c’mon — a third eye??? Regardless of how many orbital outlets someone does or doesn’t have, the point is that if you query too soon, your subconscious probably already knows this but you’ll most likely ignore it anyway and submit. And you know what? You might even get a request from Dream Agent’s assistant. Take that stupid subconscious! But if you queried too soon and are lucky enough to get past the slush reader, chances are pretty dang good you’ll get a big, fat “Not for me” from your Dream Agent. And when that happens, you’re pretty much SOL on querying that particular MS to Dream Agent again.
Why take the chance of ignoring sound advice when all you need is a rigorous scrub or two? Scrubbing is good, peeps. Use whatever you can — loofahs, that body wash with the exfoliating beads, good old-fashioned washcloth — just make sure you wash behind your ears and get between your toes. Your Dream Agent will thank you for it.
By Cam
Yeah. My creativity for blog post titles is pretty much shot. And so this is me whining about getting ready to head to RWA’s National Conference in Orlando.
But Cam, RWA offers the most comprehensive, thoroughly thoughtful, celeb-author-studded workshops EVAH. What’s the deal with your incessant screeching?
Well, I’m glad you asked. In fact, I have a LIST for why I’m running around my house with virtually no hair, a few new zits, and clad in clothes I wore ALL WEEKEND LONG:
#1 I have not packed.
#2 I have not finished my laundry of things that I *think* I may or may not pack.
#3 I did not have time to get a manicure, pedicure, brow wax, lip wax, any other kind of wax, or haircut. I will be that hairy bushwoman standing in the corner with granny shoes because my feet will be the fugliest ones in Orlando.
#4 I have not finished polishing Life After Send.
#5 I just now got around to viewing and printing out the workshop schedule. My mind is spinning because I have about 5 too many time conflicts which means I will need to make a game-time decision and have I ever mentioned to you that I’m NOT GOOD at making game-time decisions? No? Gah! I hate prioritizing when they’re all priorities!
#6 I am not a morning person. There are several workshops and meetings that require me to wake up before my leisurely time of 7:45am. My sleep cycle is already screwed by this because for the past three nights, I’ve laid awake stressing out about how I won’t be able to wake up on time. Do you see my dilemma here, peeps?
#7 WHAT SHOES AM I GOING TO BRING????
#8 I have only practiced my Just-In-Case-An-Agent-Wants-Me-To-Pitch-Her-In-The-Bathroom-While-She’s-Asking-Me-For-Toilet-Paper pitch 372 times. I need to practice at least 12,841 times for it to not sound like I’m a royal tool with a bucket of marshmallows in my mouth.
#9 DID I MENTION I HAVEN’T PACKED YET?!?!
#10 I will miss Toddler Trouble. And BicycleDude. A lot.
But despite all my whining displayed in all its gloriousness, there are still a few super stellar, awesome, full-of-fantastic reasons why all this belly-aching stress will be worth it:
I will get to hang with cool peeps. I will get to learn until my poor little brain begs me to stop soaking it all in. I will get to see Authors of Awesome in person and hopefully meet them and get their Books of Awesome signed too. I will be in Orlando (I hear it’s the Happiest Place on Earth). I will get to pretend I’m singing karaoke. I will get to meet new cool peeps, like TWITSOM, who is already full of Awesome that I’m sure the two of us in the same room together will surely make it explode. I will be present in the face of inspiration (times, like, a few thousand) as the Swan & Dolphin Resort is infiltrated by mad talent.
And these reasons trump all.
RWA 2010 will be THE BEST TIME EVERRRRRRRRR!
Cambria Dillon - YA Writer represented by Vickie Motter, Andrea Hurst Literary Management
