Not that kind of pledge.

THIS kind of pledge:

A NoRhym-O-ReMo pledge (aka: No Rhyme or Reason Month).

I found out about this challenge from my dear Twitsom (aka: Twitter Soulmate, Ricki Schultz) who runs The Write-Brained Network. She’s declaring May: NoRhym-O-ReMo. If you’re familiar with NaNoWriMo, then this concept won’t be new to you. But other than the fact that it’s May and NOT November, the nice thing about NoRhym-O-ReMo is that you can set your own daily word count goal instead of squirming over the 50K flames that make up NaNoWriMo.

If you’ve been reading my blog, then you know I’ve been suffering from a bad case of The Funk. There were so many helpful suggestions to get over this hump and it was a relief to realize I’m not the only sufferer of this malady. But I think my brain has had enough. I think it’s time for ME to tell IT that it’s time to move on and GET TO WORK. And I think NoRhym-O-ReMo is the kick in the butt I need to push me to get something on the page. ANYTHING on the page.

I’ll enter my official goal on the Write-Brained site, but I’m stating here that I pledge to write at least 500 words a day. I know I’m low-balling this goal. I mean, heck, I can usually knock out 2K in one day EASY. Of course, that was when I had Muse dust spewing out of my fingers. Now that I’ve had some time off, I realize I’d probably do better by easing into the pool rather than cannon-balling in.

So who’s with me? Anyone ready to be held accountable for their wordcount???

So I got this crazy idea last week (as if that NEVER happens to me, right?) to make a more conscious effort of getting physically fit. You see, I’ve been feeling rather sluggish lately. And while it could be the weather or the late night writing sprints that are pushing my energy levels to the max, I realized it probably had more to do with diet and activity.

Truth is, for about 120 hours a week, I live a very sedentary lifestyle (this estimate includes time spent at my day job, writing at home, and sleeping). And while I wish I could be more active during my writing time, I’ve learned it’s pretty hard to type on the computer while running, biking, swimming, lifting weights, or really doing anything that involves more than wiggling my fingers at the keyboard. It’s also very easy to fall prey to late-night Sour Patch Watermelons, chocolate, and coffee.

So to combat this downward spiral, I started a new workout program on Saturday: P90X. It’s a monster of a program which will require me to commit to not only the workout regimen, but also the nutrition plan. I’m doing the Lean version so my first workout was with the Core Synergistics DVD. Let me tell you, I about DIED with a move called SUPERMAN BANANA:

Don’t let this silly name fool you!

The SUPERMAN BANANA is in no way a superhero nor a potassium-rich treat. No, no, my friends. This move took down my name and slapped me senseless, all while reminding me to stay hydrated. I was beyond sore the next day. But no rest for the wicked! On Sunday I did the Cardio workout and, again, SUPERMAN BANANA laughed in my face, along with his friend WACKY JUMPING JACK.

Anyway, I can honestly say that today, my body HATES me.

BUT.

I already feel more alert (although it could be the Motrin), and my muscles (although screaming like a little girl) are thanking me for using them again.

Now, I’m not promoting P90X or getting money from them or anything like that (and as a disclaimer, if you’re ever going to take up a fitness program, you might want to check in with your doctor first), but this program got me thinking more about writing and how SIMILAR it is to any kind of extreme fitness regimen (for obvious reasons, I’m using P90X as an example):

P90X is a 90-day program. You’ll see results if you commit to the fitness AND the nutrition side of the program.

Writing is a commitment. This isn’t a secret. But you can’t just slap some words on the page and call it day. You have to commit to both the writing AND the revisions if you want to see a cohesive story form.

P90X relies on something called “Muscle Confusion,” where essentially it’s mixing up the workouts every day to the point where your muscles don’t have a chance to plateau.

Writing uses a different kind of “Muscle Confusion,” where essentially your brain needs to be open to the unplanned actions of your characters so they don’t seem static or one-dimensional.

P90X offers 12 different kinds of workouts ranging from Yoga to Shoulders/Chest to Cardio to Abs to Kenpo (kickboxing-like moves). It concentrates on all the major muscle groups as well as elements you wouldn’t necessarily consider in a sweat-producing regimen for a package that’s fun, full of surprises, and complete.

Writing has loads of steps — outlining, drafting, revising, revising, revising, querying, etc. You have to concentrate on the macro elements to your story (story arch, character development, plot threads, etc.) as well as the “smaller” details (active words, tight sentences, grammar, formatting, etc.) for a package that’s fun, full of surprises, and complete.

If you cheat in P90X, you’re not going to get the results you set out to accomplish.

If you cheat in writing (sloppy writing, sending out queries before you’ve finished the MSS, not revising enough, not writing at all!), you’re not going to get the results you set out to accomplish.

P90X produces a lot of sweat and tears. It’s important to eat right, stay hydrated, and BREATHE or your body will cry mutiny.

Writing produces a lot of sweat and tears. It’s important to eat right, stay hydrated, and BREATHE or your body will say ” Screw you, fancy Writer Pants!”

Bottom line is this: You don’t get by easy. If you don’t put in the hard work with your story, characters, research, craft, etc., how do you expect to see results? The simple answer is: You don’t.

I’ll keep y’all posted with my P90X progress. I’m really hoping that in addition to toning my body, I’ll be toning my mind and increasing my stamina and overall energy level. And my writer’s goal is to write a book (at least the first draft and one round of revisions) within this 90-day time line. Hopefully I’ll make it to then…? WISH ME LUCK!

Whew. I’ve been waiting to say that since Friday. But today, I can officially announce that I’m represented by Vickie Motter at Andrea Hurst Literary Management.

SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

I’ll post a separate entry on my road to getting an agent later this week because right now? It’s still sinking in. I mean, I have an AGENT?!?! Like, a REAL one?

Yeah. I can’t stop shaking my head and checking my glass for suspicious liquids.

In the meantime I’m going to start revising LIFE AFTER SEND (for my agent) (really????). My plan is to read through the whole thing by Sunday, while notating general areas I might want to change, and then layering in the things Vickie and I discussed. I think that process will probably take a couple of weeks. Then I’ll read through again. Tweak. Rinse. Repeat. And then send off for comments and line edits.

Holy moly this is INSANE. I have an agent. Who will be reading my MSS. And pitching my MSS. And then editors will be reading my MSS (hopefully). And tear it apart. Or love it. Or love to tear it apart. I don’t know. This is a total dream. I mean, not to have my poor MSS potentially be viewed and ripped apart over and over, but THIS–this whole journey is a dream.

Pinch. Pinch. Pinch. Pinch.

Yup. A total dream.

to do this:

(stirring apple butter, in case you didn’t know)

and eat a lot of this:

which meant I ended up doing very little of this:

but that’s okay because next month is this:

Where I hope to write this:

And come December, I’ll be ready to do this:

Can’t. Wait.

Anyone else planning on cashing out their writing mojo for NaNo next month?

I’m going to FAST DRAFT.

If you’re not familiar with FD, it’s basically Candace Havens’ two-week writing boot camp where the main goal is to pledge to write 20 pages a day. 20 pages X 14 days = 280 pages = 70K. That’s a whole YA book for me.

Now…it’s sort of a known fact that a fast draft is always going to look like crap on paper after the two weeks is up. It’s even worse than a first draft, if you can believe that. (I didn’t think there was anything worse than a first draft…but apparently I’m wrong.) BUT — at least there will be words that can be revised into something more coherent.

I plan on working on my new WIP (the psychological contemporary YA that I’ve only told a few people about). This will be my first attempt to write first-person present tense with dual narratives. I think when this is done I’ll either be found wandering the streets with oily hair while muttering nursery rhymes to myself, or dead. It’s 50/50 at this point.

If you want to learn more about this session’s Fast Draft, check out Bria Quinlan’s post. (And if you don’t already follow Bria, you should. She has a lot of great ideas to help writers, plus she’s one of the sweetest writers I’ve met.) You’ll need to join Candace’s yahoo group loop (it’s free), but once you’ve joined, you can see how everything works here:

FD intro: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Write_Workshop/message/107

Getting ready: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Write_Workshop/message/108

How it works: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Write_Workshop/message/109 (cut and paste then find/delete the error messages for easy reading)

The rules and getting started: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Write_Workshop/message/110

Good luck to anyone who decides to participate!

I have NEWS! And it needs my undivided attention! I won’t go into specifics except to say that if there was ever an incentive to finish the spit-polish on my MS, it’s this.

Which brings me to my Two Week Goal. I’m giving myself two weeks — 14 days/336 hours/20,160 minutes — to REVISE and QUERY. Why two weeks? Well, I’m almost there. All I need is a little push, a reasonable deadline (that I can be accountable for), to get me closer to the next step. But there’s always a bit of a risk when you’re about to send out that first batch of queries. What if *gasp* you think it’s ready but it’s really not? For me, that means my MS runs the risk of fatal Too-Soon-itis. And we all know how that goes.

So let me take you on a little journey to illustrate how querying too soon is like taking a trip to the ER:

• You make the obvious decision to go to the hospital because you have a broken arm/volatile stomach/third eye/no eye/other grotesque injury.

• You see a sign on the hospital door that says STOP! FALLING BRICKS ABOVE!

• You shrug because it’s a HOSPITAL and you’re SICK and no bricks are falling on your head. Stupid sign.

• You check in with the gum-smacking receptionist and take a seat in the germ-infested waiting area.

• You realize how bad waiting is going to suck because all you want to do is get through Triage and see a dang doctor for your broken arm/volatile stomach/third eye/no eye/other grotesque injury. But you’re stuck waiting it out in an area that’s too small, too packed, and too smelly for comfort.

• To pass the time until someone calls out your name, you decide to: read a magazine/suck at Sudoku/moan/cry for your Momma/play Hangman without the paper or pencil/plant your ass at the reception desk and tap your finger on the counter until someone pays attention to you. (I don’t suggest this last option because chances are good the guard standing by the sliding glass door is bored out of his mind and is itching–ITCHING–to throw a sucker to the curb.)

• FINALLY your name is called (and with minimal butchering of your last name) after just ten hours of waiting!

• You drag your tired and cranky and now-smelly body to Registration where you give every pertinent detail of your life and promise your first-born child/cat/dog/cupcake to a woman who eyes the small-hand on the clock like she’s getting paid to do that instead of processing your info.

• You wait again.

• Twenty-one hours later and a nurse with a glowing halo above her head and a parade of silky white doves following her every step, calls you back.

• You say a silent prayer and hope it’s really you she’s talking to.

• You gleefully tell the ER Doctor (who’s none too pleased at having drawn the short straw) all about your broken arm/volatile stomach/third eye/no eye/other grotesque injury. No detail is too small to leave out. This is your LIFE we’re talking about here.

• ER Doctor jabs you in parts you didn’t think you could get jabbed.

• After thirty seconds, she tells you your ailment was all in your head and if you just take this discharge sheet and follow the security guard outside, he’ll make sure you get to your car alright (and put you on the Never Allowed Back To The Hospital Again list).

• You drive  home, stare at the wall for a few days/weeks/months, then Eureeka! You realize maybe that ER Doctor was onto something. Maybe you just had a case of the Too-Soons and a good scour or ten in the shower was all you needed to bypass the ER waiting room in the first place.

Obviously, I’ve taken some liberties with this analogy. I mean c’mon — a third eye??? Regardless of how many orbital outlets someone does or doesn’t have, the point is that if you query too soon, your subconscious probably already knows this but you’ll most likely ignore it anyway and submit. And you know what? You might even get a request from Dream Agent’s assistant. Take that stupid subconscious! But if you queried too soon and are lucky enough to get past the slush reader, chances are pretty dang good you’ll get a big, fat “Not for me” from your Dream Agent. And when that happens, you’re pretty much SOL on querying that particular MS to Dream Agent again.

Why take the chance of ignoring sound advice when all you need is a rigorous scrub or two? Scrubbing is good, peeps. Use whatever you can — loofahs, that body wash with the exfoliating beads, good old-fashioned washcloth — just make sure you wash behind your ears and get between your toes. Your Dream Agent will thank you for it.

Maybe something like this:

Because it’s the coolest feeling to stamp THE END on something you loved writing. I’m proud of my first-draft LIFE AFTER SEND baby.

Ending first draft count: 83K

This is me excited: @#*&*?$%^$!=?*&#.

Why am I so excited to start revising? Because this will be a first for me. I’ve never (and I’m totally embarrassed to admit this) EVER done a second draft before. I’m a chronic first-draft heart-breaker.

Here’s how my story relationships usually go down:

Day One:

Me: I <333333 YOU SHINY NEW IDEA!!!!! I CAN’T WAIT TO WRITE YOU!!! Wanna go steady? Like, right now? You + Me = 4EVAH.

Shiny New Idea: Duh, silly! I <3 you too! I’ve been trying to get your attention, for like, WEEKS! Took you long enough to notice my shinyness.

Week Two:

Me: I don’t understand what happened between us. The spark…I mean, things were going so fast. So deliciously fast. And now…well, you’re just so weird sometimes. I don’t get you anymore. You’ve changed, Shiny New Idea.

Shiny New Idea: What do you mean??? This has always been me. Maybe YOU’VE changed. Have you thought about that?

One Month Later:

Me: Um…so I’ve been meaning to talk to you…this “thing” between us? Yeah, I’m not so sure it’s working out. The chemistry…I don’t think it’s there anymore.

Not So Shiny New Idea: But…but…you’re right. It WAS me. I changed. A little. But I didn’t think you’d notice. I’ll go back to how it was. I’ll be shiny again. PROMISE. Just…just…give me another chance. PLEEEEEASE.

Me: I’ll think about it.

One Month + One Day Later:

Me: Okay…one more week. ONE.

Not So Shiny New Idea: You won’t regret this. Pinky swear.

One Month + One Week Later:

Me: Sooooooo. It’s been a week. And…it just wasn’t as good for me as I thought it would be. You’ll always have a place in my heart, Not So Shiny New Idea. But I really think we should take a break. Like, the permanent kind. I might even *gasp* move you into my No-Go First Draft folder.

Not So Shiny New Idea: Wh-wh-what???????????? I’ll change again. I just need a little more time. Just give me—

Me: Sorry, Not So Shiny New Idea. But there’s someone else.

So you see, my first draft relationships have been kind of flat. But not so with NOT THAT GIRL LIFE AFTER SEND (oops, I keep forgetting I had to change the title because of a title snafu that made me think I might as well nip that in the butt from the get-go, know what I mean?). Because LIFE AFTER SEND is my loverly. I <3 it. A lot. And my fellow YAFFers seem to like it, too. I’m working with my mentor on the synopsis right now. I do not like the synopsis. I now realize why everyone calls it sucknopsis. Because it does. Suck.

I’ll post tomorrow…hopefully with the news that I finished LIFE AFTER SEND.

My brain may be close to dead, but I’m not done with BLUR yet. There’s still about 10-15K more to the story that I need to add…and then I can take out my sharpest knife to slice away the fat and add the seasoning.

We’re supposed to get snow here today. And then on Friday. And then on Saturday. Hubs told me that the Emergency Operations Service is calling for 24-40 inches of snow during the Fri-Sat storm. Uh, w-what? We had 26 inches in December and I thought that was quite ridiculous. I’m not even sure I can picture 40 inches (and it’s a good thing this is a G-rated site otherwise this vast amount would take on a whole nother context). Needless to say, lots of snow means: Lots of tea, lots of Baby Girl kisses, and lots of writing. I’m pretty optimistic I’ll be done with the first draft by the end of the weekend.

Stay tuned to see whether I’m a woman of my word or a woman of great delusions. It’s a toss up.

I guess if I were being technical though, I could say I’m a non-goal completer rather than a maker because I do have accomplishments in mind and realize what I need to do to get there. But you won’t find any fancy Goal Charts or To-Do Lists, or Gold Stars, or anything that’s remotely outlined in my world. If you haven’t noticed from previous posts, I tend to shy away from organization.

The reason why I think I’m a non-goal completer isn’t because I don’t understand the value or necessity of it, but because I lack the follow-through. Maybe there’s something wired wrong in my noggin or maybe it’s, I dunno—life—that gets in the way of completing my goals. But I find that if I skip one day with the promise of making it up the next and I don’t, then it snowballs until I’m so behind that I just say, “The heck with it” and go off to the next thing.

Somehow though, I manage to get things done even if I don’t do it by way of hard goals. My admiration is high for those goal makers out there. You know who you are— you make a list, follow it daily, and cross it off when the task is complete then repeat and repeat until at the end of the week, or month, or year, you breathe a sigh of self-satisfaction and look at us non-goal makers and say, “Neener, neener.”

Well, in the theme of my post last week of trying new things, I’ve decided to…drum roll please…MAKE A GOAL and FINISH IT. Astonishing, I know.  What I’ve done to make myself accountable is post a thread in Romance Divas with my own personal goals.

Here they are:

1. Write at least 500 words a day. Every day.
2. Shut off internal editor
3. Do not get sidetracked by shiny new web site
4. Have first draft completed by Oct. 28
5. Blog in advance so as not to get sidetracked by shiny new web site (see above)

Note: I can already say with certainty that I’ve already failed miserably with #3. What can I say? It’s so pretty, and shiny, and new…And #2 is real close to joining the ranks of the non-completed as well. But I’m happy to report I’ve written MORE than 500 words a day since Friday, which is when I made these goals. (And yes, you may pat me on the back.)

In addition to the above goals, I’m also participating in the Divas August NaNoWriMo (nothing officially tied to the real NaNoWriMo, but just a fun thing to stay motivated). I’ve pledged to write 30K for the month and am happy to say—so far, so good.

So, tell me…are you a fellow non-goal maker/completer or a goal maker?